Until we meet again...

Only in the agony of parting do
we look into the depths of love.
~George Eliot

Agony is a good word.
I think it's the only word to describe how I felt as I watched
my parents rental car pull away from our driveway.

From the moment I saw my Mother from across the
airport, one thing was entirely clear: The countdown clock had started.
Every moment we spent together meant we were only one moment
closer to being separated. I was acutely aware of each second ticking away.

Friday night as my head finally hit the pillow, I fell apart.

I am terrible at good-byes.
It's not something I'm proud of, and the story of my life is littered with
uncomfortable endings simply because I don't have the character of strength
to look someone in the eye and say the words "Good-Bye."

On Saturday morning I put on (what I hope was) a brave face and it lasted all of
5 minutes. As soon as the luggage hit the trunk, and the kids said good-bye,
heartbreak took it's cold grip on my heart and the waterworks began.

It was almost unbearable walking my parents to their car but I smiled through it.
But watching them physically leave. Watching them drive away to the airport, removing themselves from us.

It was torturous.
It was agony.
It was Despair.

But it was also worth it.
I'd cry on ocean of tears for every
minute I get to have my Parents to myself.

Yes, it was so worth it.
I love you both so very much!